Well the Christmas season is officially here! This used to be my favorite time of the year back before I had children. Now, all I feel is constant pressure to do this, that and the other. I just can’t do it and guess what? I won’t. I've never really been crafty or homemaker-esque because I was just born without that part of the brain; HOWEVER, the one traditional thing that I love about the holidays is Santa! I will go to the ends of the Earth to keep good ole' St. Nick alive and well in my home every year. That said, I’m not a fan of the elf on the shelf. My sister sends me these pictures of all the wacky things her elf does to her kids and I just say, “Really? You’re one of those?” after which, I get called a bitch, followed by even MORE pictures of that crazy elf and his shenanigans. The craziest thing my elf has done was sit on a ceiling fan one night. WooHoo! The one good thing about the elf, is that it keeps the Santa spirit alive and the kids in line, until recently. Sissy, my oldest daughter, is 10 years old and starting to ask too many questions about Santa. I hate it! Thank goodness I have two other babies who will start believing in Santa in the next year or two, but the idea that my first baby may not believe in Santa much longer really sucks!!
Each year, she has tried your usual run of the mill tests:
Well played, child, well played…I have had several friends suggest that I just purchase the duck call and autograph it myself but no thanks! I quote the great Barney Stinson, “Challenge Accepted!” So I proceed to frantically post all over Facebook for anyone to help me out with this ridiculous request! I've had a few bites from people in the West Monroe area who think that they might be able to help, but no takers just yet. I've even contacted the Duck Commander people directly and dropped the veteran card, because hey, I’m a veteran! Still nothing. It’s getting closer to Christmas and I’m starting to sweat bullets!! I guess worst case scenario, I accept defeat and sign the duck call myself; however, I feel like that’s being too dishonest. We shall see. In the meantime, if anyone is reading this, and has any connections that could help me come through with this Christmas present you will make one little girl and her mother very happy. Even if this is her last Christmas to believe in Santa, I’d like it to be a memorable one.
- Writing a “secret wish list” that only Santa will see when she goes to visit him (lucky for me, the Santa we visit goes to our church and hooked me up with the contents of this “secret wish list”);
- Asking for gifts WAY too expensive for any normal parent to provide (I squashed this real fast by reminding her that we are in a worldwide recession and that includes the North Pole); and,
This year’s zinger!
- Requesting a Triple Threat Duck Call from Duck Commander, signed by Korie and Si Robertson because "they aren't expensive and if you can’t get it for me, Santa will."
Well played, child, well played…I have had several friends suggest that I just purchase the duck call and autograph it myself but no thanks! I quote the great Barney Stinson, “Challenge Accepted!” So I proceed to frantically post all over Facebook for anyone to help me out with this ridiculous request! I've had a few bites from people in the West Monroe area who think that they might be able to help, but no takers just yet. I've even contacted the Duck Commander people directly and dropped the veteran card, because hey, I’m a veteran! Still nothing. It’s getting closer to Christmas and I’m starting to sweat bullets!! I guess worst case scenario, I accept defeat and sign the duck call myself; however, I feel like that’s being too dishonest. We shall see. In the meantime, if anyone is reading this, and has any connections that could help me come through with this Christmas present you will make one little girl and her mother very happy. Even if this is her last Christmas to believe in Santa, I’d like it to be a memorable one.
(This is my son. Photoshop is a wonderful thing.)
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